DIY Your Life Compass: Your Core Values, Part 1

Who Do You Want to Be?

Core Values are your navigation tool to get you to where you want to be.  Who do you want to be?  Your Core Values are your foundational drivers that keep you on the right route to becoming who you are supposed to be, even when you feel like you are losing your way.  They are your “Why”  that drives your choices.

Companies often lay out their Core Values to advertise their desired image and (supposedly?)  to guide their business decisions.  We, as individuals, can take some time to identify who we are–or who we wish to be–in order to fulfill our life’s purpose.

The Reality of Identity

The current buzzword is “IDENTITY.”   People sit around thinking about “Who am I?” And then they declare to the world how others should view them., based on how they feel.

In reality, however, we actually don’t get to determine our identity merely by “naming and claiming” it, no matter how deeply we feel about it.

 Our TRUE identity is formed from the sum of thousands of micro choices we make each hour. These micro choices are the tangible, solid, actual action steps we can daily choose because of who we want to become.  That is what forms us into the person we are.

A Compass For Intentional Living

But, in order to map out where those steps should go, it helps to lay out our Core Values so we have a compass to direct us.  

Many times, if we feel unhappy in our life, it is because we are not living in harmony with our Core Values. It is a conflict between what we are doing and what we value.  

According to psychology, there is an actual term for this.  It is called Cognitive Dissonance.  

It is when our actions do not line up with our beliefs.  

The goal is to identify the things you value so that you can line your daily choices, your micro habits, your environment, your hobbies, your relationships, and, even possibly, your career pursuits with these things.  

This is how you live your life with intentionality so that you accomplish what you want, and you don’t waste a bunch of time.

 This is what happens when you feel like everything is clicking into place. 

What I Am Not Talking About:

 I need to do a hard stop here and make sure I am being clear on one thing.  I am not talking about identifying “Your Truth.”  As a believer in Christ, I firmly believe that Jesus is “the Way, the Truth, and the Life” (John 14:6).  I purpose that all of my values will have, at their source, the Truth that God lays out in his Word to guide all my choices and beliefs.

Today, the current pop culture is all about a “mindfulness” movement.  I recognize the practical usefulness of this idea: actually paying attention to the here and now ,and acknowledging your feelings, thoughts, and choices in this moment.  However, I have come to the conclusion that there is ultimately no future hope in this.  Secular mindfulness is based on just the here and now–and just my own personal truth, thoughts, and values. 

But, as a follower of Jesus Christ, I have the security of being able to firmly set my values on something, Someone, so much bigger than me:  with an eternal view based on the power of the infinite, loving, all-powerful Creator of all things, who knows me and loves me.   

So, to be clear,  I am not talking about religious doctrine or beliefs, secular psychology, New Age woo woo stuff, or creating our own truth and identity out of our own flawed minds and flighty feelings.    

What I Am Talking About:

I am talking about the parts of your personality that make up who you are, which can be different for each person.

  Truth, real Truth, from God, does not change, but each of us has a different set of values and pursuits that make our hearts sing. 

 A person who has a core value of Beauty, for instance, will find joy when their home is clean and decorated, or when they have fresh flowers on their table. 

A person who has a value of Compassion might love working at an animal rescue or being a nurse. 

Someone who loves Determination and Grit might be the one who runs a marathon at age 55 because they love a challenge (that will not be me).  

I am not talking about the weird idea of “manifesting.”  I am talking about identifying who you want to be, and then taking action steps to become that person.

So, in real time, as I go about my day, my Core Values can give me direction.-are the things I am doing today shaping me into the person I wish to be tomorrow?  

How Can I Use My Core Values to Live With Intention?

I can use my Core Values to reevaluate how I have been spending my time. Is endless scrolling doing anything at all to shape me into who I want to be?  If I love Creativity, wouldn’t it be better to paint something or play the piano than to sit on Facebook for an hour?  If I value Family, will it do to be on my phone all night instead of talking to the people actually sitting in the same room with me?  

I can use my Core Values to help drive change in myself.  I am a person who, when faced with a challenge, has the potential to go either way:  I so easily can sink into whining, self-pity, and wimping out.  But I also do have it in me, a tiny bit, to press on with determination. If I set Determination/Pressing On/Grit as one of my Core Values, remembering this value can be the call to action I need when I don’t feel like choosing grit. 

I can use my Core Values to help me make more healthful choices. Is eating that extra cookie, or sitting around for hours at night, shaping me (quite literally!) into who I want to be?  If I set a value of Wellness out there, should I maybe go for a walk or set my timer to do some stretches and squats while I’m on my porch writing?  

I can use my Core Values to help me make decisions. For example, I was really struggling with whether to keep all my bazillion random thoughts to myself or to share them on a blog. I looked at my Core Values and my life mission statement to realize that the reason I kept having a desire to start writing was because it aligns with these values of Testimony/Wisdom, Encouraging Others, Learning, and Creativity. 

After all of this consideration., I decided that, if just one person was encouraged by one of my crazy thoughts here, or if I was able to reflect God in a small way, it was worth giving it a shot. And , it turns out, learning how to put together a website has been a fun outlet for my desire to learn and create.  It just fit into all the parts of who I am. This is why that nagging desire to write would just not go away. 

I can use my Core Values when things don’t go how I wanted.   When I found out I had Multiple Sclerosis, I feared the future (not gonna lie, I still do, but it usually doesn’t consume my thoughts):  What if something happens to me, and I can no longer do the things I enjoy doing?  If I lose the ability to see or walk or talk, for instance, what then?  If that time comes, it will probably have to come down to deciding this:  well, what things can you do with what you have now to act out your values?   One of my values is Kindness.  Can I still be kind to someone and encourage them that day?  

A Project For You to Try:

 

In my next post I will talk about how I determined my list of values.  It was harder than I thought, and I did not follow directions that very wise people advised.  But I still was able to come up with a list.  

Your assignment, should you choose to accept it:  Google “Core Values List” and start priming your mind about what values seem to resonate with you.  There will be too many to narrow it down.  That is ok.   We will talk about how to dial in to what matters to you most in part 2 of this post.

See you next time!!!